A Small Set Back

Last Thursday I spent my time sitting in my quiet room at the library with my headphones listening to   the interviews with my dad. I felt like for the last two writings I needed more details and direction and just sitting and taking notes was great use of time.  However, there was a lot of material to sift through and I didn't get much actual writing completed. No worries, I have the weekend. Yeah, right. The weather combination this weekend was a disaster waiting to happen for my head. I suffer from migraines that are weather induced. My Dr. and I have worked very hard on getting a strong hold on them, but every once in awhile the humidity and barometric pressure come together and incapacitate me. I was done for all weekend long. Needless to say, I didn't get any work done. So here I am, Monday morning, in bed, recovering.  I took a sick day, as I knew there was no way my head could deal with seventh graders today! So I will see how much I can get done. Luckily, I have Wednesday off too. I would really like to have all of the writing work completed by my next meeting with Dr. Zamora and move on to the next phase, searching for ways to put it all together!

Moving Along

As of now I have three more formal writing drafts to create. I feel like when I finish drafting there will be a huge sigh of relief. Of course I'm nowhere near the "end in sight." Thinking about how to put it all together is up next, gathering photos and other mediums that I may need is on the horizon, and going back and revising all of my work will be last before I actually put it all together. There's a lot going on and September is over!

I spoke to a friend at work about some tech ideas. She just graduated NYU with her Master's in Digital Media Designs, and said she would love to sit with me after school and help out. I am very thankful to her. I have a vision in my head for what I would like the finished product to look like, but I haven't really searched around and explored yet. I need to. But I really just want to get my writings completed. One thing at a time.

I also told my dad that we need a date at his home (my childhood home) to go through some of his personal photos and memorabilia. He started whipping out pictures instantly. I also have my aunt in Florida on the case. She thinks she may have some old pics of my dad and uncle when they were little. Searching through all of my own family photos will be fun too. My dad gave me our box of pics and several photo albums to hold onto after my mom passed away. It'll be fun digging in.

It's stressful and cause of relief at the same time knowing that I have my list, have a game plan, and am moving along.

A Bit Sappy

So I'm sitting in the public library down the road from my school because if I stay in my classroom I'll grade papers and if I go home I'll play with my dogs. So here I am. I walk in like a B-list celebrity as a bunch of kids from school are here mostly pretending to do homework and can't seem to understand why one of their teachers is invading their space. The "quiet room" in the back is filled for a little while and I have to sit at a long bench between a math tutor and his student discussing fractions and a foul mouthed fifteen year old and her "cool" aunt holding some sort of counseling session. It is hard to concentrate. Finally, a spot opens up and I am able to go into the quiet room and work. I am much more productive. I finish my second set of parallel stories that needed a massive overhaul from the weekend and I get to blog.

I've been thinking a lot about the happiness this project is bringing me. Dr. Zamora asked me last week reflective questions and I really have been thinking.... This project has purpose for my family. My father, my best friend and buddy, is also the most stubborn man and a source of frustration in my life. At 85 years old I suppose he's earned the right to be. I wasn't really sure how he would embrace my work. Throughout grad school he has liked some things that I've written, one story in particular since it had to do with my mom, but I can honestly say that he is now excited and involved. He comes over each week for Sunday dinner. As I cook I sometimes work. He, of his own accord, has sat down, taken my computer and read my writings. I can't believe it. Two weeks in a row! I can't even express how much this gesture means to me. He has been a great provider when I have needed clarifying follow up information and continually supports whatever I need. I just wasn't expecting this. I figured he'd check it out when it was finished, and that would've been ok with me. I just hope it comes out the way I envision and that I make him proud.

As I Start Creating

I'm in the middle of writing my first piece right now and needed to take a break because I'm being very hard on myself. I am using this blog to refocus myself and remind myself that this is a work in progress and I am creating drafts at the moment. There will be time for revision and adjusting later. This does not need to be perfect and probably will never be perfect. It's not coming out exactly as I want, but that's ok for now. I need to start and get it going. I love revision and when the time comes I will strengthen all of my pieces.

I decided to keep a list of concerns or thoughts that are bothering me about each piece while I write or after I read it over, so I know my focus areas later. I also know that I need to get more specific information from my dad about a few of these tales of his. I should be happy to have a focus for now. OK- a walk outside to see my pups and then back at it.

What Will It Look Like?

I've been thinking about what my creative take on my dad's interviews will look like. His interviews became a looking glass into his life as a child growing in Newark during the Depression and WW II. The interviews were rich with stories of family, neighborhood, sibling bonding, and friendship. His life was very different than mine as a child, but I couldn't help thinking about common threads that came up. I mentioned one in my last block about being that neighborhood kid. I also could connect when he talked about the bond he felt with his brother. Growing up, I definitely had a similar bond with one of my brothers and my sister. I think that although my dad and his friends got into a lot more mischief than I did, they still had a lot of regular kid moments.

All of these thoughts lead me to what I would like to create for my writing project. I would like to capture many of my father's stories through my writing and then create a parallel story of my own that connects to his. It would be a kind of parallel memoir?? with first a written interpretation of one of my dad's moments, then I would create a piece about a memory of my own that came back to me when he shared. For example the topic could be a moment he felt really scared or how the movies played an important role in his life as a child. I know that both of our mini-memoirs need to be more than just a retelling, so I feel that more interview work needs to be completed to get to the heart of why these moments were important.

 I would like to show how the power of oral history can bring about familial connections and make family members reflect on their own lives in new ways.

Reflection on 1st Interviews- July 29, 2016

So here I am...after some let downs and feelings of defeat. A new plan is on the rise. What is most refreshing is that the "bones" of the original project are there. I am actually excited even though the original methodology has changed and reworking needed to be done. I think going forward, I need to remember my lowest moment and know that I made it through that moment. That may come in handy around the end of November when I am feeling crunch time. So after a helpful video conference with Dr. Zamora, I feel ready to start digging in.

The interviews: So I have had two sessions with my dad. It has been really fun, but also really hard! There is definitely a learning curve when learning how to interview well. I guess maybe I thought it would be easy because it's my dad, but now I'm thinking maybe that has made it harder. Since I know him so well, it is hard for me to think about how to pose my questions to him. Sometimes as I'm asking questions I think to myself, "am I leading him?" "did that sound ok/ was it clear?" It's important for me to keep the interviews authentic. I don't want them to ever feel as though I am guiding or leading them. So far, I think I'm doing a good job. The most important thing that I have realized is to just let him talk. My job is to listen.

What has been interesting for me is thinking about how my dad's childhood may have had an influence on me and my life. There are certain themes that keep coming up that I feel have carried over into my own childhood and even have had a trickle down effect into my adulthood. For example, he shares so much about the neighborhood and the apartment house he lived in and of the bond he felt to the kids that made up his "gang." If he grew up elsewhere, how would his friendships and loyalties have changed? The neighborhood that was their endless playground would never have been. The fact that he recalls, at eighty five years old, all of the mischief and moments that he got into as a kid tells me that this place and these friends were and are important to him. I too was a "neighborhood kid." My dad encouraged my siblings and me to play in the neighborhood with our friends. I didn't get into the same predicaments he did, but living in my neighborhood did have an impact on me.and the person I have become. Did he and my mom buy a home in a place that felt like it had the same qualities that they grew up in? It wasn't the city but it had a feel to it, similar to what my dad describes in his interviews. I grew up in a neighborhood filled with kids, corner stores, and parks. I could have stayed inside and played with Barbie dolls or Atari, but more times than not, I chose to be outside, a "neighborhood kid." Bike riding. Playing at the park. Kickball in the street. Exploring St. Georges Pharmacy. Climbing Trees. Would my dad have been happy if his kids did not follow in his footsteps as kids who embraced their neighborhood?

There are other threads that seem to be rising to the surface. We'll see how the next few interviews go!

I'm Still Here

Hey ya'll. So I know I've been a little quite on the blog.  Doing a lot of thesis work and managing a lot of stuff at work and managing some life stuff. 

I finished writing up a draft proposal today. It's been hard. I know it's nowhere where it needs to be and that sucks. Think a lot of frustration crept in while doing research and thinking about what my focus really is. I gave myself a break thinking of all the advice you guys and Dr. Zamora gave me when telling me that this is a long process, and it takes time to get where you feel right. 

That being said, I'm glad that I'm at least starting and that my wheels are spinning. I won't be able to join you guys Thursday on the video chat as I have parent teacher conferences that night. Much rather be hanging in cyber world with you guys. See ya soon. I'm sure you're all doing amazing work.